The word

Words | SusannahConway.com

 

Recent history has proved to me that choosing a word for the year is effing powerful. And it doesn’t have to be just one word — you could choose two or more, a phrase, a mantra, a statement or a theme. I’ve been seeing lots of blog posts lately explaining why setting New Year’s resolutions are pointless, and I do agree with that — while “get fit” sounds like a sensible goal to have, it doesn’t feel very inspiring. It feels like an order. Choosing the word ‘energised’ or even ‘strong’ affects me in a different way. It encourages me to make better choices. It seduces and cajoles rather than instructs.

For the last five years I’ve selected a single word to act as a guiding light for the coming twelve months. I don’t do anything fancy to find the word — usually a few possibles occur to me as the year winds down and I’ll mindmap them in my journal until one starts taking centre stage. Often I choose a word I know will help me with all I have to do in the coming year — for example, BRAVE was the perfect choice for all the book shenanigans in 2012. VISIBLE was perfect for growing my fledgling business in 2009.

My word for 2013 was OPEN and sure enough, there were plenty of opportunities to practice staying open last year. At times it was like taking a crowbar to my mended heart, but I’d remind myself ‘stay open, stay open’ and breathe through the discomfort. I did a lot of breathing last year. My introverted HSP self would often want to close back down into her cocoon, but all things considered I think I’ve done a pretty good job of staying open. It’s a practice I’m carrying with me into the new year. Probably for the rest of my life, let’s face it.

This year I was tempted to choose LOVE as my word. I’ve been wanting to do this since I started the word-choosing thing, but have always held back for fear it was too obvious. Words are important to me, and I take the selection of my yearly word quite seriously. So I journalled into LOVE to see if it was my true word or were there others I needed to live through first? And there was one little word that’s been tugging at my sleeve for a while. I see it in books and draw it out of oracle decks. It’s been following me around and every time I notice it I feel a nudge at my side…

 

My word of the year | SusannahConway.com

 

I have many supporting words this year, including romance, surrender, trust and open (again), but it’s MIRACLES that’s been stalking me. I can’t seem to get away from it, so I’m embracing it as my word for 2014. To me it means something magical and unexpected happening, which is exactly what some of my dreams and desires feel like, so I’m opening myself to miracles this year. I’m holding on to possiblity. I’m believing in magic. I’m trusting my gut. I’m listening for guidance.

I want to experience miracles in every part of my life, and to reach the end of 2014 smiling in amazement at all that’s unfolded.  I want to love and be loved. I want to be seen and heard. I want to break out of the cocoon and drink deeply from life. I am so ready for this. I’m not scared to do the work. I’m not scared to make my miracles happen.

I believe in miracles. Don’t you?

Previous words: 2013 :: 2012 :: 2011 : 2010 :: 2009

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What’s your word (or words) for 2014? I’d love to know xx

The year in review

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First, the year in stats:

Number of teeth removed: 1
Number of moles removed: 1
Number of stitches: 3
Number of muscles built: a lot
Number of years on the planet: 40
Number of first dates: 6
Number of second dates: 1
Number of third dates: 0
Number of new tattoos: 2
Number of trips abroad: 1
Number of new courses launched: 1
Number of book contracts signed: 1
Number of years deleted from my blog: 3 (2006 – 2008)

I feel ready to say goodbye to 2013. After all the outward movement of last year, 2013 has been positively hermit-like in comparison. I started January wading through the depression my return to London had triggered, and for the rest of the year my goal has been to heal myself, physically, mentally and emotionally. Knowing I couldn’t do this on my own I reached out for help and found Wendy, my therapist, and Carrie, my personal trainer. I’ve been diligently working with these two wonderful women (who are both Americans living in the UK, interestingly) each week and the progress I’ve made in both my physical fitness — planks and push ups weren’t even on my radar last year — and emotional health has been enormous.

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Of course, committing to an inward journey like this has meant I’ve been less present online this year. I’ve been plugging away at this biz of mine since I created my first ecourse back in January 2009 — after four years of steady growth, and a LOT of time at the computer, it was time to pull back and devote energy to my offline life. This hasn’t been the most comfortable transition, but it was definitely necessary. As I gave myself space to figure stuff out, I also started online dating again, and though I haven’t had that many dates the few I have had let me see the gap between my online and offline life needed to be tackled. My solution was to blank slate the first three years of this blog, a decision that’s helped me let go of the grief story I’ve felt defined by for so long and stand firmly were I am now.

As I greet the new year as a single woman, it’s clear the dating hasn’t been the greatest success, and while there’s a part of me that wants to quit, the desire for love and companionship still burns strong. I’ve made big strides in the direction of my dreams, and opened my heart in ways I hadn’t expected, so while this year didn’t bring me what I wished for, it’s certainly moved me closer — I have to believe that.

In summary, it’s been a quietly challenging year and I’m leaving it physically stronger, mentally clearer and emotionally humbler. I feel raw and opened, but rather than close down, I’m staying this way so I’m ready for whatever 2014 has in store for me.

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Fave books of the year: Shockingly, I haven’t read any fiction this year, but I’ve had non-fiction coming out my ears. Some of the most useful include The Highly Sensitive Person, The Dark Side of the Light Chasers, True Refuge, Writing Down Your Soul

Fave music of the year: Gabrielle Aplin | London Grammar | Haim

Fave moment of the year: with Noah in the John Lewis loos

Fave week of the year: The week away with my family in May was wonderful, and my birthday trip to NYC in February was just what I needed, but it was our Redfox retreat in October that truly blew me away

Redfox retreat
Physical accomplishment of the year: maintaining a respectable level of physical fitness all year by going to the gym and working out with Carrie — her arrival in my life has been such a blessing.

Bonus physical accomplishment: giving up gluten has transformed my body, in a really good way. Decades of digestion issues have finally been resolved.

Fave posts of the year: Journaling & me: a love story | 40 lessons from 40 years | Eight years | This boy | Three | Notes on being a hermit | The exercise-hater’s guide to loving the gym | How I shoot with my iPhone | This is why therapy rocks

I’ll be finishing my workbook tomorrow with candles, incense and a heart full of intention. Thank you for sharing this space with me this year. I know I haven’t been here as much — in all honesty it’s been weird not to be able to blog about every aha as I had it! — but I’ve got plans for some ace new stuff in 2014, and I think you’re going to like it. xo

Other years in review: 2012 :: 2011 :: 2010 :: 2009

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Wishing you all a peaceful end to 2013 — I’ll be back here on Wednesday with my word of the year (have you picked yours yet? The workbook helped me nail mine down, so give that a try if you’re still undecided. Then tell me what it is on Wednesday :)

Something for the weekend

letters

Hello loves, how was your Christmas break? I’m back home and missing my little blondie bear something fierce. It was the first time he’s really understood the ramifications of wish lists and Father Christmas, so it was heart-melting to see him excitedly opening the presents the big FC left by the fireplace. These are the moments we live for, eh?

Only a few links this week…

Shakshouka | 8 kale salad recipes | miso tahini soup

Sit on a small wooden bench with yourself

How to write

Don’t make smalltalk about my daughter’s appearance

‘Be all your selves’ — Joss Whedon’s commencement address

Sensitivity is beautiful

Something small, every day

And now I want to be an action figure too :)

Space Christmas. from Susannah Conway on 8tracks Radio.

Something for the weekend

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The things we do for love – truth from Derek

What if girls were rewarded for being authentic instead of being thin?

Also: when your mother says she’s fat

The wrong rock – you know i adore Jason

[video] Female freedom has an expiration date

Bruce Springsteen, Woody Allen and the long tradition of hating your own work

These necklaces | this book

Espresso martini | honey apricot millet | quinoa + brussels sprout salad

Favorite job interview questions (read the comments)

[video] The power of introverts illustrated

Christine translated the 2014 workbook into Ukranian!

How Elizabeth Gilbert writes

Happy Christmas weekend, my loves — I’ll be back next week with an alternative yet seasonal mixtape for you xo